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Not me. Imagine you wake up one morning at your very best. You get up feeling great, full of energy and motivated for the day ahead. And you know you can handle it. Imagine every interaction goes as well as it could possibly go. You feel extremely confident and sure of yourself yet humble and interested in others.

You are at your most engaging, entertaining and persuasive. You can read other people effortlessly and know exactly what to say. You get through to whoever you speak to easily and motivate them, inspire them, connect with them. You use the right word at the right time in the right situation with the right person, each and every time.


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If this were true, what would life be like for you? What would your personal experiences be like? What would your professional life be like? How would people see you? How would you see yourself? How would they feel about you? How would you feel about yourself? Like you, I have an interest in—a passion for—what makes people tick and how to perform at your absolute best.

Get the Charismatic Edge with Owen Fitzpatrick

If we could only be at our very best it would transform our world. It would have a huge impact on our income, our interactions, our inner sense of happiness. We know this. And yet we rarely live up to our best. We rarely reach our potential. Why is this? The reality is that the vast majority of people on this planet are not living up to the very best versions of themselves. Instead, their personalities are on life support, only awakening on special occasions within the comfort zones of close friends and family.

Sit on a bus or train and you will see little evidence of life. Despite such close proximity, we have never felt so far apart from our fellow-humans. We hide who we are when we meet people, in our social life, in business. We try to be who we think we should, dress how we think we should and speak how we think we should. We do so to fit in. We want others to approve of us, to love us, to be impressed by us. We crave acceptance. But using that as an excuse not to communicate as best we can is where we make the biggest mistake.

Some of the most successful people in the world are introverted, but when they need to communicate they can.

Barack Obama is an example of this. The excuses we tell ourselves permit us to justify a lack of effort, or a dearth of results. And the fascinating thing is this: the most obvious difference between very successful people and everyone else is that the successful make far fewer excuses. However, many of us are afraid of contact—fearful of interaction, terrified of making a fool of ourselves. This stifles us, traps us, limits us. The result of this is that we live an average life, in average circumstances, and we get by.

Let me ask you a question. I ask you because it was never enough for me. In order to get more I learnt that two things need to happen. Firstly, you need to get over the fears that prevent you from doing so.

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Then you need to know what to do to impact others more. To get over the fears that hold you back you need to look inward and examine who you are—who you really are. You need to get to know your character—the truth about yourself. You need to get to like yourself and be comfortable with being yourself much more frequently. Then you will be able to overcome fear. Once you reach that milestone the next step will be learning what to do to become more effective at delivering your message. And the rules have changed.

The social and corporate worlds today are radically different from those of the past. Knowing how to be at your best in communicating is a whole new game at the present day. Globalisation has meant that our friendships are often dispersed around the world. The internet has created a new kind of virtual friendship that emphasises shortened bursts of written communication. We tweet and post Facebook photos, always planting a smile on our face as we try to get others to see us in a positive light.

How to Master the Art and Science of Charisma

We advertise how we are, what we think and how we feel in spurts of revelation by means of social media. We communicate through text messages and email in a virtual world, a virtual reality. And when we do interact in the real physical world, things have changed. We no longer live in a world where we are granted full attention. Now we have to earn it. We have to grab it.

We have to keep it. We face competition, not just in the business world but in our personal lives. There are so many other things someone can be doing, so many other choices they have instead of spending time with us, that we have to be of constant interest and relevance to them. In this world of limited attention you have to understand what to do in order to stand out, engage and influence others. That means learning from the thousands of years of study and research in the field of communication into how you can do so with impact.

It means learning all you can about the psychology of influence, personal development, neuro-linguistic programming, leadership, marketing, sales, comedy, storytelling and media training, to name but a few areas of study. You have to be prepared to practise skills that have been tried and tested in the modern world, to duplicate the strategies used by the most compelling and charismatic speakers and to apply the principles and insights of the very best leaders, salespeople, politicians, lawyers, preachers, actors, voice coaches, screenwriters, therapists, life and business coaches, trainers, speakers, novelists, socialites, attraction experts and marketing geniuses.

The beauty is that, regardless of their field, all these experts offer us powerful insights into what makes some people engaging and compelling to listen to and others not. The wonderful news is that we have never known more about how the mind works than we do today. Brain research has taught us more about the mind in the last three years than in the last three thousand.

We have never known more about how people are influenced. We have never known more about how people make decisions and about how to keep them focused. The information is there. If only there was a way to comb through the terabytes of information and find the most important principles and insights that relate to creating a powerful effect when you communicate. If only this could be packed into a book you could read in a matter of hours. That is my goal in this book. In it, I will share almost twenty years of experience and the most prevalent insights into human communication to answer two crucial questions: how you can become the very best version of yourself, and how you can express yourself to others in an engaging and memorable way.

So, my purpose is twofold: to help you become more you and to help you express yourself to others in such a way that they want more of you. Here I will invite you to explore you —the real you—and share with you strategies and techniques that will enable you to be more like you, and to like you more. This tackles the ever-pressing issue of becoming far more secure in yourself.

How to Master the Art and Science of Charisma

Here I will share with you the very best insights and skills for understanding how to put yourself across to others in the most desirable manner, and for maximising your physicality, body language and voice. This will include leadership, sales, interviews, flirting, relationships, parenting and lots more. When you apply the ideas herein, life will never be the same again for you. But not only for you. I believe that what this world needs more than ever is a revolution in how we relate to each other.

It needs more people to stand up and be themselves. I want this book to help both yourself and others. I hope you can share the ideas I present to you with your friends and colleagues, because I believe we need a change, a shift, a new viewpoint on ourselves and on the world.

I hope you will join with me in this. I want to challenge you not just to be your best, but to do your best. This book is not designed to swamp you with the vast amount of existing research. Here you get the nutrients—without the fat! The GM should roll 2d6 for strangers you interact with, adding your Charisma.